chokingonapples@yahoo.com

Dear Jon,

So I called that girl. And so now I'm sitting here, waiting, like a girl. Except I'm waiting for that girl to call me back. This would be unlike girls who wait for boys to call them back. Sometimes I wait for boys to call me back, but not like I'm waiting for this girl to call me back. (I'm sure you can figure out how unnecessary the past few sentences were.) But what are the chances of this girl calling me back? 1) it takes guts to call people you don't know and 2) it takes an extra portion of guts or great deal of bile to call someone with the object of rejecting them. And girls don't have guts. Some say girls don't poop. Well, they poop. Of course they poop. But they don't have guts.

Ah, but I love my plight. I half revel in the awkward interactions between myself and girls. It's such a confession of our humanity. But this doesn't mean I escape the goofy emotions that tag along. Assuredly not. But those emotions bounce both ways. Let's continue.

My next thoughts were: but that girl has such a pretty name. Maybe the prettiest name I've ever heard! Her facebook lists are pretty good and vague enough to let me imagine what I want; her phone number is really cool; her voicemail message was like...super cute.

But she hasn't called.

So then, Jon, I begin to doubt myself. (Tenses are shifting, how disorienting, my apologies) You know, how did I let it come to this? I shouldn't have left that message. I should have tried back again and again until she picked up. Then I ask the deep questions: why do I try to "go out" on New Year's Eve? I have delusions of romantic grandeur and I forget myself. The critics are right: I like physics and soccer and video games. Live, loud music hurts my ears. But I swear I would really enjoy ice skating. My ice skating with a girl sounds terrific. Admittedly, I would be pretty skeptical of some boy wanting to go ice skating with a girl myself. Some soft boy. Some caring, sensitive boy who reads Twilight as research.

I hung out with three, female ex-coworkers of mine (including Katrina of the golden iPod). They agreed that all the boys they've dated/interacted with romantically have all been caring, unlike how it used to be. I questioned them about their knowledge of what "it used to be like", but ultimately I agreed with them. What do white guys do these days? Listen to emotional music and not study science. Whatever. That girl still hasn't called me.

-Max

Happy New Year's Eve Morn

Sometimes I email Jon. And in those emails, I can be pretty funny I think. So I'm going to pretend you're Jon, okay? "We're fated to pretend." Good deal. If you are Jon, then I don't know. Pretend you're not Jon and then pretend to be Jon. Should be a stretching experience for you. Almost literally. Almost. You'd be walking a mile in somebody else's shoes who happen to be walking a mile in your shoes at the same time. Geometrically, I don't know where this takes you. Probably nowhere. (When I heard about those guys throwing shoes at Bush, I asked if any hit him. I was told he dodged 'em all and, in that moment, I was proud to be an American.) (That was probably the funniest bit in this whole post.)(Also, I'm prone to generalizations in my emails to Jon; It's assumed you're not stupid.) (I'm beta testing a new style of parenthetical formatting.) (I'm going to now call it quits and make this its own post.)

http://www.lunadrift.com/play/music-catch.html

Three Wishes

Sometimes, when I'm not doing anything, I wish I had cute eccentric hobbies that I could then blog about.

I don't know why I have such an urge to deceive people on facebook, but I really want to change my status to "Max Clark just ran a marathon!" (I could dress it up, claim it was for needy kids this holiday season, but...it's better as is)

I want to fly like an eagle.

Hot Dog

when i was young and when i am now, i choose to wear a minimal amount of clothing and sit in front of a space heater. sometimes i also eat a bowl of cereal. it feels like this grotesque indulgence sometimes. especially when like...i could just go put on a sweatshirt and socks.

anyway, i don't feel so bad anymore, because my dog, bell, not only sits with me, she roots in. she takes the prime spot in front of the heater and i don't mind. i'm kind of impressed she can handle that kind of heat. and she doesn't wear any clothes at all.

actually, something just disturbed her. she just got up and went downstairs. do you think she can read?

whatever. the heater is mine for now.

For No One

My blog, while personally cathartic, is not the most fluid reading. How much of this can I chalk up to Max's style? A bit.

"Love" is an MMO being created entirely by one person. It claims ambitious things and its existence inspires me and also makes me a little jealous and insecure regarding my own originality. Also, the dude's blog is a little obnoxious.

As for Superstruct, I am less excited, but I like it. It's roleplaying, which is fun. Pretending to be living in the future provides opportunity to make a lot fun stuff up. Within it, I have the intention of joining Jane McGonagall's group that is trying to deal with the Superthreat of the new widespread respiratory disease. Her group is one that is brainstorming ideas for ways that games can aid in the fight against this highly contagious disease in the year 2019. The diseased must stay at home. So Jane's thoughts are that games can provide entertainment and community to these otherwise ostracized individuals.

To join Jane's group, one must provide to her an example of a fun game experience in the last three years (2016-2019). My idea is that nanotechnology had cropped up (as we all know) and found its guinea pigs in animals and its first consumer markets were pet owners. Physical games (sports, if you will) were created that involved highly trainable and easily healed animals (think of real life Pokemon). and this had encouraged further research and discovery in nanotechnology. Due to the popularity of the more violent animal games, animals rights enthusiasts had made the government proscribe all nano-implements in animals and banned the games (don't you remember all the PETA fiascoes [who knew "fiascoes" had an "e"?] during Christmas 2018?).

After gaining acceptance to Jane's group with my highly imaginative and realistic 2017 gaming experience that expresses the bond between man and animal and hard work and life and death and government interference and justice , I would suggest fantastic MMOs that would provide community, reflect truth, parody the pretentious, reward the clever, uplift the downtrodden.

Jane would then fund me.
And also travel back in time and marry me.
Back to 2008.
But she would also become younger in 2008.
A sort of double-time travel.
Actually, she has a husband.
In 2008.
Right now.
What have I just said?

Configus

Configus strategic paradox

LovePosted by Eskil Steenberg Fri, July 04, 2008 02:59:13
Thinking of AI tactics I remembered something I once wrote:

-Have you heard of the story of Configus?
-I cant say I have.
-As the story goes, in the land beyond the two rivers, Configus was one of two princes who were twin brothers. They lived under the rule of their father. But as the father grew old he could not decide who would inherit the throne, so what he did was that he divided his mighty army in two and gave each brother one half, and he made it so that he who could lead his army in to victory against his brother would inherit the throne.
Now the two armies was set up on each side of great mountain, and there were two paths around the mountain. One was a treacherous one that could exhaust the strongest of horses, full of narrow ridges and deep abysses, dry with nothing to eat and nothing to drink. However the path on the other side went threw a lush valley where streams of spring water soared and fruits grew on the trees.
Configus, thought long to choose his path, and he thought that the path threw the valley would be easier on his men and horses. But if the easy path was chosen, his brother would anticipate him and stage an ambush. So perhaps the hard path would be wiser. However his brother was just as wise as him and could also anticipate this. So perhaps this diversion was too obvious, but was it also too obvious to his brother? The more Configus thought about it, the more bewildered he got. Soon he found that what ever reasons he had his brother could anticipate. Hence he found himself in a dilemma of strategic paradox.
But as he truly believed that all men are created equal by god as brothers, And as his brother had a mind identical to his, he found no reason why his brother would not make as good of a ruler as he. So he choose to spare his army and alone he rode to meet his brother and once he found his brother, The first blade of his brothers army was stabbed in to his body and he fell dead from his horse. When his brother heard of Configus death he cried, because he had failed to anticipate his own brothers intentions, and thus he was not able to spare his life.
-So the other brother took the throne?
-Yes, he got the throne.
-I should know of him, who was the other brother?
-His name has been forgotten.

Comments(3)

Ranteaters

Economics is huge to me.

Hmm.

Oftentimes, in school or whatever, questions overwhelm me.

For instance, on my physics homework, frequently when I first read a question, I open my eyes all the way (I'm told my eyes are always half shut and this sometimes makes me look high) and try to consider every possible set of physical laws that could apply to the situation. So this means I must consider every universe, and what the heck that is even supposed to mean, is there a uniqueness proof or something that guarantees our universe is the solution and what? Then I worry briefly about whether or not I'm intelligent, whether or not I'll be able to make it, whether should I drop out of school and pursue my dreams? What will my dad say? Then I bob back with the thoughts about how stupid I've found other people to be and that relatively speaking I'll do ok, and I'll my classes are graded on a curve which is good and bad and nah nah nah. And then I remember I just read a chapter talking specifically about certain applications and derivations of laws governing this universe, which is the same one my professor exists in and has learned about and is only expecting me to consider the problem in light of these assumptions.

There are 4 forces in our universe we know of. I have studied two a fair amount. There are laws of mathematics that hold in the realm of our physical universe and I have studied these a fair amount. Enough to satisfy the meager demands of my professor. These are the steps of babes.

This post started with my desire to express my view of the significance of an individual's economic perspective. Immediately, however, and this happens all the time (as I was just relating), I got stuck. I am overwhelmed. What the heck do I mean by economics? And boy, I mean a lot. I have almost despaired of trying to explain to you my thoughts on this. This is heavy.

Usually, and many of you have experienced this, I simply talk to someone at length and attempt to simultaneously order my thoughts. Usually recapping and refining as a I go. This I find satisfying. There is typically something I need to convey about my thoughts that are most easily expressed through tone and other things communicated through speech. Although, my tongue readily stumbles when I ask too much of it.

I guess, after sitting and thinking about this for a bit...

When I refer to one's view of economics, it generally is the idea of man's work. So there's a ton to be said about motivational analysis and community and obligation. So it's pretty heavy stuff.

I don't profess consistency between my ideas and my behavior; I don't profess coherency between my thoughts and my ideas.

Sometimes, when I read others' words, these grotesque analogies and examples they use stick out grotesquely. My mind creates invisible wiggly red lines under their pathetic explanations for their views. Squiggly lines that do not indicate spelling errors, but thought errrors. I then, of course, want to rant against them. Then I think about others who rant against others and how I'm usually a half fan and think they're reactionary. Also, if I were to rant against the intial offender and their terrible thinking, I must also beware of my own invisible red squiggly lines under my text. How dreadful.

The idea of dealing comprehensively with anything pretty much necessitates dealing with everything ever. Right? I don't see how much of anything can be wholly separated from much of anything. I spent 20 minutes considering why some cute girl walking along ring road would choose to smoke a cigarette. Ultimately I concluded that all I knew was that she is in fact a cute girl and that, most likely, this has been observed by tons of males and that their desire for her is in no way less classy or sophisticated than mine.

There is this great divide in my life! I enjoy making decisions and taking pragmatic action and solving problems with pace (which is a soccer player's way of saying quickly). I am expert optimizer! If I'm given two things to compare, I'll do it and I'll give a preference, it may be slight or it may be severe. I don't love every problem and I don't only love solving problems. While I am polydimensional here, I do not claim to be n-dimensional. The trouble with all of this is that if you ask me what ought and I'll sit in a corner and cry without tears.

The secret things of God are His. --Deuteronomy

Incidentally, I am voting this November in the election held in the US of A.

Am genuinely excited about reading the props for the first time within the booth, standing there for a good fifteen minutes, and then voting Yes or voting No. As for presidente americana, meh.

I like emotions I have that I consider classifying as patriotic.

Also, I'm not sure if South Africa is really even a country.

Insoluble

Sick of the leeches.
Sick of the rocks.
Sick of the magnifying glasses.

I'm kinda pissy right now.

Hasta la Vista

I'm terribly in love with the aesthetic of my last post. I would prefer it to remain at the top of this blog for a while yet, but greater than this is my need to express myself!

I have a terror. I'm realizing that the path of life I have chosen will became rather inane once we have nano-technology that performs the function of red blood cells some ridiculous percentage better than red blood cells, so we can run without growing weary and sit under water for hours, all because we get a little more oxygen. This fear has gripped me because I'm trying to become a cyborg. A physically domineering analyst.

Max Cyborg Clark.

Let's look at our fears straight on though. Bear with me, readers, while I confront reality: I cannot defeat the Terminator.

At least, "for a homeschooler", I have a lot of personality. Bishop (the robot-man with white blood from Aliens), Schwarzenegger, these weren't particularly personable humanoids.

DO WHAT GIVES YOU THE HEEBIE JEEBIES.

Greyhounds

At the Irvine Spectrum today, there was a booth and a fenced in area for the California Greyhound Adoption Program (CGAP). For about 10 minutes, I stood with my backpack on my back, my thumbs inside my backpack straps (think of how people tuck their thumbs inside their suspenders), looking at the dogs.

People around me came and left and I thought about my plans to graduate college in 2010, adopt two Greyhounds the day after, then the next day, drive to New York.

I have the CGAP card in my wallet now.

Sorry Mr. King

David Sirlin, video game designer, concludes one of this articles with a quote:

You can approach the act of writing with nervousness, excitement, hopefulness, or even despair—the sense that you can never completely put on the page what’s in your mind and heart. You can come to the act with your fists clenched and your eyes narrowed, ready to kick ass and take down names. You can come to it because you want a girl to marry you or you want to change the world. Come to it any way but lightly. Let me say it again: you must not come lightly to the blank page.

—Stephen King

Pssh. Like, I get where you're coming from, Steph, but c'mon, that was a little cheesey. The only part I like is "You can come to it because you want a girl to marry you." Perhaps that's because that's the kind of despair I can sort of understand; the other motivations I find suspect. "Nervousness"? Do you want to read a writer who wrote because of nervousness? A friend of mine once recalled to me that the last time he cried was when he was telling his parents that Speakers should have something to say.

I don't have any papers that professors want me to publish and I certainly don't generate any new mathematical or scientific knowledge at all. Most of my thoughts during most of the day shift between three gears: where I should deposit my body and in what employment in should then be in, wtheck the professor's lecturing on, and if I should hit on girls passing me by.

This is my blog and, paraphrasing another friend in the words of yet a third friend who was makes fun of a commercial thusly, "I do what I want."

They say that oftentimes when a girl relates a problem to a boy isn't in pursuit of problem solving ability, but a friend to lend an ear, to be understood. Well, treat me like a girl.

Speaking of girls, let's get it out there on the table. The idea of Girls is a rather common theme on this blog (at first I was going to say "dominant theme" then "subtle" because subtlety is both fun to type and I'm a big fan of it). It seems there is a necessary minimum of time that is spent thinking about romantic love. The mind's time is spent either considering directly the relationship with one's boyfriend or girlfriend and in what direction that will continue, or if there is no one occupying that position, one spends a great deal of time considering who might next fill it and how that will come to be. Unless one is married. I cannot speak to that. This situation, as it is for me, is simultaneously frustrating and exhilarating. I sometimes don't understand how others go about handling this, though. So much pretending.

I was once lauded for my "blatant honesty."

It probably wouldn't be easy, but I could probably sleep with a girl this weekend if I were really intent on it, which, I'm told, is nothing to brag about. I might be told that, but I'm not sure I believe it. Insofar as nothing should be bragged about, it's true. However, I'm pretty sure there are a fair amount of boys who would like very much to have sex this weekend, but won't be getting any.

I often identify a defect in a person or a negative trend in a group and then jump to concluding that that entity is worthless. This does apply to my self-analytical process. Part of it wanting to be able to conclusively point to x and blame it for everything, which is partly my desire for holistic analytic results, partly due to my own laziness, and partly due to the commonality of factors and pervade an entire system. Let's be aware of this and move on.

So sex. After having labored in physic class or math class or programming with dozens of nerds and an overcompensating AC, I have described to Louis and to Johann, that my reward is to then step out in the 94 degree Irvine sunshine and walk past 100s of students, some wearing short shorts. Right. At one point I thought I should learn to appreciate beauty where I find it. I don't think this is proper mental self-discipline. Problem solvers provide me with a variety of ways for me to get to know these random girls, in place of ogling. It is a tricky problem and provides a considerable challenge, upon which the problem solvers practice their ingenuity and indulge their enjoyment of the absurd. One only has 10 minutes, one is trying to get to another class, iPods in their ears, dozens of people between you and her, some dude walking next to her, and so on. Simple self-introduction? Ask for directions? Then ask what their major is? Bump into them? I offered a girl a tic-tac once. I was rejected.



Oh man. I'm a little tired of this blog post.

Ultimately, this is a nice thing to be worrying about rather than not having enough money for school, having AIDS, being a eunuch, or having to fight He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.

About Me

An "About Me:":

I would like to adopt a brace of Greyhounds within the next 5 years. I have considered naming one Peeve. Actually, I just considered that name for the first time less than 5 minutes ago. You tell me why.

Also, I am principally against putting inside jokes as quotes on one's Facebook. It is, as you might guess, a pet peeve of mine.

Intuition

On the back of a stall door in ICS building at UCI, there was written, "What is intuition?"

I couldn't help myself and replied, on the stall door, "I think we all know what the answer to that question is!"

Another response was, "What girls say when they fall for assholes."

A few days later (as in today), there were two more comments. The one up and to the right simply criticized the handwriting of the original query. The bottom comment said, "lots of people have pens when they poop."

Almost Infinite #2

Physics > Soccer > Girls > Video Games > Painting > Physics

Santa Barbara Honies

There are things I want to recount that would be funny, but there is the slightest chance that a highly proficient facebook stalker could track this blog down to her own detriment. Although, shwatever.

I will say this: on a daily basis, I walk past many pretty girls at UCI.

I'm not one hundred percent sure what to do about this.

And trust me, I've put a lot of thought into it.

Attitudes

GK Chesterton platitudes....just kidding, my platitudes! My two platitudes...

1) That which is called a "bed of roses" usually is just that: seemingly beautiful, but in actuality thorny and in no way desirable (even though people typically use this phrase in a negative way, "sorry to disappoint you, it's not a bed a roses.").

2) That which is called "sour grapes" usually is just that: providing, at first, a thrill until one realizes its emptiness and that is an illusion of meaningful love, possibly leaving one bitter.

I once had a book of platitudes that GK Chesterton had scrawled on. It had his markings on each saying, crossing out clauses, adding his own. It was cool. I think GK had used a green crayon to do it also. Crayons were a great invention.

F

I have decided to allow myself to cuss when I play soccer competitively.

But not when I blog.

50-something-ith

This weekend, I managed to host what I have calculated to be my fifty-something-ith boys' all-nighter. My Live-Action Gears of War game was well received.

Next month, on the 24th, I will introduce The Labyrinth Game I have made up.


Active players:

Jingle-Men (2): Carries knife or shortsword without a shield; can be killed by sword wound, water balloon, acid; wears bells or windchimes causing jingling if moved.

Harpies (2-3): Throws water balloons, but only outside; can be killed by wound, acid; has nests where water balloons are stored.

Acid Creepers (2): Sprays or touches to attack; it is unknown how to kill an Acid Creeper; is blindfolded permanently.

Minotaur (1): Has mace and might have projectile; it is unknown how to kill a Minotaur; has a lair with Minotaur eggs.

Teams (3-5): Is composed of three members; carries an ice chest for the attempted collection of items; can achieve Pac-Man mode.

Non-Active players:

Gravekeeper (1): Records the deaths and the causes of deaths for all active players; oversees water balloon production; oversees the ghosthood and resurrection of active players.

Shopkeeper (1): Sells store goods; buys items collected from the labyrinth; updates the treasure map.

Villagers (1-?): Wanders in labyrinth; says weird things; does weird things.

Warden (1): Is Max Clark; makes you play by the rules; makes up rules on the fly; expects you to play by rules made up on the fly.

Items to be bought (with real money):

Sword
Pike
Shield
Acid spray
Map
Flashlight
Harpy water balloons
Gatorade/soda
Cookies
Milk
and maybe more!

Schedule Fall 2008

You, reader, are my newfound accountability partner...

Enrolled Classes for FALL '08

                             
Crse           Crse     Sec      Grd                                     
Code  Dept     Num  Typ Num Unts Opt    Days    Time          Bldg Room  
----  ----     ---- --- --- ---- ---    ----    ----          ---- ----  

36560 I&C SCI    22 LEC   A  6.0  GR mc   T T   03:30-04:50   PSCB 120   
36562 I&C SCI    22 LAB   2  0.0  GR     M W    06:00-07:50pm ICS  189   
44700 MATH     120A LEC   A  4.0  GR     M W F  11:00-11:50   ET   202   
44705 MATH     120A DIS  10  0.0  GR      T T   11:00-11:50   MSTB 122   
47584 PHYSICS   52A LAB   5  2.0  GR      T     06:00-08:50pm MSTB 117   
47628 PHYSICS  111A LEC   A  4.0  GR mc   T T   02:00-03:20   ELH  110   
47632 PHYSICS  111A DIS  A1  0.0  GR mc  M      01:00-01:50   RH   108   
47636 PHYSICS  112A LEC   A  4.0  GR mc   T T   09:30-10:50   PSCB 120   
47640 PHYSICS  112A DIS  A1  0.0  GR mc      F  01:00-01:50   PCB  1200  
                                                                        
      total units enrolled 20.0       0.0 p/np units                    
                                                                        
                                          mc = meeting room/time changed

Intro to Group Theory

This quarter is off to a great start:

Subject: No Math 120A section tomorrow
From: "Barry Smith"
Date: Wed, September 24, 2008 9:10 pm
To: 44700-F08@classes.uci.edu

I had a good laugh.

While I look down upon students who look down on learning, I also enjoy the camaraderie of rejoicing over canceled classes. Yipee!

For further reading, although nonessential, I have put copied down the following for students who want to push themselves or are in a graduate maxalanclark.blogspot program and want a more thorough understanding:

Dear class,

I am very excited about being your instructor for Math 120A this quarter.
Algebra is some of my favorite mathematics, and I hope that I can impart
some of my enjoyment of the subject through this class.

Because we have not had a lecture yet, there is no discussion section
tomorrow. See you on Friday.

Best Wishes,
Prof. Smith

Physics Fail

I missed the Physics department BBQ and the following soccer game because I failed to thoroughly read the email and determine that
1) the BBQ as not where the game was and
2) that the game was not where it was last quarter.

Furthermore, I failed to reach my (errant) destination(s) regardless, because the new car battery put in when I returned to California, managed to come a little lose and would not start my car. I might be registered for electromagnetism this quarter, but I had to wait an hour for the AAA towtruck to come reattach the negatively charged cable and make every thing "nice and tight" before I could then drive to the wrong field. However, I did have Harry Potter 6 with me, so I enjoyed reading about Harry getting all twitterpated for Ginny.

This all could mean any or all or two of three things:
1) magic > physics
2) the need to switch majors
3) establishing social ties with fellow physicists is not meant to be

Analogies #3-#17

"She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.

From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and "Jeopardy" comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.

Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.

Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.

Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access T:flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@ung but gets T:\flw.quidaaakk/ch@ung by mistake.

He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man."

Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.

His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free. "

Analogy #2

"He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it."

Poem #1

Free-Verse Poem About Girls

There's something alarmingly charming about girls.
They're smaller and softer than I.
They're terribly cute when they cry.
Ladies beware:
I'll act proud and strong, cavalier and crass;
sometimes I am quite an ass.

There's something disarmingly alluring about girls.
No matter their race, creed, or religion,
trust me, I won't care a smidgen.
Ladies beware:
I'll have a devilish urge when you're near
to seize and kiss you, I fear.

Blogger Spacetime Travel

Can someone explain why the last four posts are said to be posted at 9:41 AM?

If this claims otherwise, I am posting it at 5:46 PM on Thursday, September 18, 2008.

Remembrall

Thought of something I wanted to blog about while running.

Forgot it.

Analogy #1

"They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth."

Phone #s

Interesting.

I added my phone number to the Facebook phone number glossary, or rather, phonebook.

(562) 774-7295

Nearly everyone went with periods to break up the digits.

Notably, Mark Makin, Jonathan Wright, and I did not.

Jonathan may have blundered a bit with an extra dash though.

"(562)-325-2541"

Blundering isn't like him.

I believe I would have chosen the parenthetical and dash without having looked at others' entries.

I want to say there's something to this, but I dunno.

What I want to say is the following:

Everyone's both trying to be cool and also our technological age has made the xxx.xxx.xxxx format cool (businesses have been doing it for a while, probably to appear sleek and technical like the internetting).

Louis did it, perhaps without thinking, because he has become accustomed to it, but prior to that familiarity considered this issue, thinks in this case that it is not a compromise to adopt the format and the advantage is to became appealing to his market; consumer perception is important and is not necessarily self-deception; using this format can actually represent having a finger on the pulse of whatever one needs to know the pulse of.

Makin broke suit, because he pays little attention to trends and is not a follower.

Jon and Max did it to uphold tradition and do not have a particular reason to break with it.

Max especially did it to flaunt his rebellion.

But I dunno.

Kids Book

In this blog post, the idea of dumbing down kids' books will be considered. I hate the idea of dumbing down kids' books. Alpha, the world is seriously obfuscated and not reflecting that, but reflecting some simple pimple version is dumb. This might give children a simplistic world view. It also doesn't give them insight into the Real World 2. Beta, when I was kiddish, my mom read the Lord of the Rings to me. I loved it. I didn't pick out "the only time we're given is the time we're given. duh." as my favorite quote though. I didn't recognize the folly of Saruman in messing around too much with naughty things.

What of little kids' books? I'm not talking about "learn how to read" books. Although I could. Would one consider Go Dogs Go dumbed down? That the world represented there makes evil out to be simple or love to be superficial, unlike in our world? No. Because dogs are pretty dumb and superficial, rather mercenary-like and their most evil acts consist of stealing food, or sometimes killing a baby. I'm sorry.

Whatever. I read Till We Have Faces the other days. And then I read about 2 pages of Confessions. And now I've read about 34 pages of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. What, couldn't use colons in the title, J.K.? Didn't think of that? Didn't even think of an ampersand either, huh? Just kiddin'. But not about the post.



















Couldn't find the cover art to Kids Book. This will have to do.

WoW

All right. Johann the South African has a friend who runs his own World of Warcraft server. This means Johann and I could play WoW without paying monthly subscriptions. Before you get too excited, I don't know how many free subscriptions I can toss out.

But playing WoW once ought to be done. Like reading Harry Potter. These are the classics of our age.

Also, we should start a clan. Picking classes wouldn't be unlike the Briggs-Myers stuff. We'll be elitist. We'll be fantastic. We'll gain notoriety. We'll experiment socially. We'll be the Sarah Lawrence Speech Society of Death Clan.

Ben: Tauren Druid
Louis: Human Paladin
Jon: Blood Elf Warlock
Brianna and Corie: Night Elf Priestesses
The South African: Drainei Mage
Josiah: Troll Shaman
Daniel: Undead Warrior
Max: Orc Hunter
The nunners: Gnomes of all sorts

Start reading up, guys. Also, we want to avoid blunders.

No? Video games are dumb? There's nothing worthwhile in playing around in a game that has 10 million subscribers? Yeah. You have a point. I hate fantasy. So childish.

Realistically I suppose I should just target the guys.

Hang on. One more argument (see below).

Hunger

I'm preoccupied with eating. Almost literally.

We spend so much damn time eating.

Do you remember those days, as a little boy, when you would skip a meal, or "scarf down" a meal in about 2 minutes, simply to run out and play again? Yeah you do. Those were good days. I recall jumping into the pool and still chewing under water during summer.

This blog isn't like that. I want this blog to be like that. I'm intentionally still here, not because I prefer this to eating, but because I want to recreate that time in my life. Why aren't my fellow Toscana Luxury Apartment neighbors all outside playing hide n'seek? Or freaking paintball. If you've been to the G-unit, you're familiar with the lab-rat maze within which it stands. It would make great terrain for some sort of live-action gaming.

Why aren't we doing that? Why are we eating?

Breakfast Time

Again, Johann gets off work at 5 PM or so. Yesterday, not 'til 6. And again, I just dropped that microbiologist off.

I am hungry; let's talk about eating. Sometimes I sit and wonder what everybody eats. What do you eat? There was a homosexual (East) Asian guy in my Mechanics course. He asked, "What do white people eat?" and was genuinely perplexed. He had rice. All the time. He said. It made up the bulk of his menu. What do I eat? I eat cereal. A hecka lotta cereal. Rice and cereal make sense to me. Bread is the basic food these days or grain or whatever. Carbohydrates provide the most calories/gram. Something like 9 kilocalories/gram. But, there are other foods. Like fruits and meat and...beans and nuts and sugar.

But what about fruits? Fruits are fantastic and I do eat them often. As many others have noted, fruits come ready made, ready packaged, while also being nutritious. Meats are freaking awesome, but cold cuts are much less so. I tend to eat meat seldom, due the difficulty in preparing it. If I were to always eat out, eating would be easy. As it is, eating is not easy. Preparation is killer. For no good reason, I'm a pretty cheap guy. That being said, I am terribly jealous of any Biolans with meal plans.

The eating habits of fellow college students interest me. I know a fair amount of college students, but I haven't lived in dorms and so I haven't really observed their eating habits. I've had one roommate. And now a South African, who hardly counts. We can't consider his eating habits normative.

Because I have a plan!
I am going to buy a lunch pail. Or cooler.
I am going to take my lunch to school with me.
Every day.
But I don't know what to put in it.
I am genuinely interested in chicken salad.
And potatoe salad.
And regular types of salad.
I have never made any of the above types of salad though.

I have hopes of efficiently preparing my week's lunches all on Sunday evening or something. Or with minimal effort and minimal grocery trips. I love efficiency and regularly estimate how much money I spent on gasoline driving 2.3 miles round trip to the grocery store. I think I might go eat some Cheerios with honey on top and a banana slices in it now. Which is what I had 1.5 bowls of last night around midnight. And for breakfast yesterday.

So what do white people eat?
What should I eat?

Maybe I'll be brave. I have eggs. I have hotdogs. I have onions. I bought tortillas with the explicit hope of eating them. I wish I had my potatoes back.

"Hell, it's about time."

Johann gets off work at 5 PM, when I'll pick him up. I have just dropped Johann off.

UC Irvine Fall quarter starts in 10 days.

I am in Irvine.
I am downloading Starcraft using Bit Torrent.
Idleness is the Devil's playground.

My reasons for downloading the first Starcraft are 1) it's a superlative game and 2) playing it will prepare me for Starcraft II. And Starcraft II is coming:


It is my intention to methodically and fastidiously play Starcraft II. I will practice alone, I will watch videos of other players, I will watch videos of my own play, I will read articles, I will analyze my playing, I will speak to other players, I will play in tournaments, I will mess around. Starcraft II will be the preeminent competitive PC game. It will have its subculture. It will not "express the personal viewpoint [of its designers] and express [their] sincere feelings." It will not be Braid:


This represents the two types of video games I am passionate about. They are not on either ends of a spectrum; they are distinct types. Although, one is a AAA title and the other is a small-budget indie game.

My download is finished.

Telepathy is Communication. Duh.

I quickly stop when I start down the self-analytical/self-referential road. It just doesn't hold the thrills for me it used to.

Because I enjoy reading my friends' blogs, because they act as one possible filter for dealing with the information of life that I can look through to see what I can see, because I want to improve my thinking and writing, because 0 posts is as far from infinite as 1,000 posts, here I stand, blogging on my bed.

1) Would a game with points for finding grammatical errors in my blog be worthwhile?
2) "This sentence is false" has never made sense to me.
3) "This sentence is true" has recently not made sense to me.
4) I don't believe in aliens.
5) I once acronymed my name in the following way:
Man
Animal
Xenomorph

Conflicted

The idea that the act of communication makes the communicated items worth less has corrupted me. Do I want to live in a telepathic universe? I suppose so. Do I?




I really considered stopping after my previous sentence.




I really considered stopping after my previous sentence.

Almost Infinite

This Summer, in Idaho, a dear friend of mine misspoke. Or maybe I misspoke. Or maybe I'm misspeaking now. Nonetheless, someone uttered, "...almost infinite." Immediately, I made fun of that person, unless I was already making fun someone by my saying it. This idea of Almost Infinite is funny. After some consideration, I realized that I am Almost Infinite. I had a beginning, which I cannot remember, but I'm not so sure I will end. So take my simple paradox, remember the Weight of Glory, do good work, and love one another.

I am named Max Clark.
And God gave me life.

May my biography begin:

He was named Max Clark.
And God gave him life.
And it was not wasted.